25 September, 2008

Unhappines and pressure

It's been long since i last update... More than a month when i saw my last blog date... I've always thought about updating... But i just got lazy whenever i'm home or i've got no more mood to blog or i feel that there's no point telling the whole wide world what i'm thinking after all right...
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I've submitted my exchange study plan to be approved today... Finally after so much of struggling whether should i apply or not... Though it's not like if i submit i'll get it... And Simran actually give up the thought of going... I thought i'll at least have her to accompany me when going on exchange even though we won't be staying together... And now it's like i'm really alone there... =(
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Exams approaching soon... And i'm really worried about it... And surprisingly my motivation to start studying is already here when the exams are still one month away... Perhaps it's coz i really know there's a lot to study and to catch up on... It's not such an easy life in uni... I feel like giving up on saturday and sunday work... It's making me real tired though there's nothing much i have to do when working... It's the waking up in the early morning that's torturing me... The weekend tireness actually affects me for the whole week and normally causes me to miss a lot of classes the subsequent week... Even my psychology lecturer knows about me not going to lecture and has been warning about it in lectures... Sigh... Another sad face... =(
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Copied and paste from Kim Han's blog:
'Don't ever leave the one you love for the one you like, because the one you like will leave you for the one they love.'

Read it in library and didn't quite get it until Michelle, Simran and Sue explained to me cause they were there with me... We were trying to slot in people to actually explain the scenerio to me... And i asked the question, what if we are leaving a person who love us but is only someone we like... Isn't it contradicting...

There's eleven steps to be taken which i'll not be mentioning what steps are them... I seriously can't guarantee that even if those eleven steps are successfully taken...I'll be back with you... But even if i'm not back with you... You have at least accomplished something... I'm sorry that i have constantly been hurting you and you have actually been such a nice guy to actually keep forgiving me and stayed by my side... But after all... Relationship concerns two people... Things will only work out if both side have a common goal to achieve... If any one side have doubts... Things will not work out... So perhaps we should just let nature take its flow and not expect too much out of everything...
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Friendships...
Personally in my opinion... If the bond is there... It'll be there... The bond is just like a wire to an electrical appliance... If it is overused... It will overheat and just break off... If it's left unused and suddenly you want to use it one day... You might face problems with the appliance at first... Only when it's constantly being used... The appliance will be working in its best form...

Yes i know everyone is kind of having hard feelings for each other already... Though i'm not very invlove in it because i have always choose to ignore problems when it occurs and it seems that i've made a smart choice this time round... I don't really encourage all of us to sit together to talk things out because i feel it will make things worse off... But perhaps everyone of you should at least tell out what you are thinking to the person who you are kind of disappointed with... It's not a group problem now... It's an individual to individual problem...

But again... If things really don't work out... My suggestion will still be... Leave it and move on...
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To Kim Han:
I'm sorry about the 4th or 5th night... I'm really sorry... But i've actually been emotionally tired... My brain doesn't function in the night nowadays... It'll just shut off... So forgive me for not keeping up to what i said i'll do ok...???
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It's a lengthy post and i am still here in uni... Dad boiled soup at home... I thought of going home early to rest and at least not drinking my dad's soup at the oddest time which i've always been doing but i guess dinner tonight is essential...
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Sigh... He's not telling me stuff... And i've mentioned before if he don't mention anything... I'll not ask... I guess i just have to put up with this hearing stuff from others rather than him...
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Bye people...